A few years ago, I had an idea to add a new function to PHP: array_column(). Starting out on this journey can be daunting to user-land developers unfamiliar with the landscape of the PHP internals. In this talk, I demystify this process, explaining how to set up an environment, create an RFC, communicate on the mailing lists, and send a pull request. I hope this talk will encourage you to scratch your own itch and contribute to the PHP core.